Emeka and I met during our National Youth Service Corp days at Abuja, we became good friends which later developed into love relationship.
He is the kind of man I have always wanted to spend the whole of my life with, he is caring, understanding and loving. I have never caught him cheating on me. He has always been faithful even when my friends threw advances at him, he maintained the man he has always promised me – FAITHFUL MAN!
We spent most of our times together. Though I had a shared rented apartment with one of my friends while he had his, but we were fond of living together in his house, though he also had a roommate but theirs apartment was a two bedroom flat, every man to his room. We became the cynosure of all eyes among corp members, they watched us with admiration as we unintentionally made our relationship be the talk among corp members with the way we appeared like love-birds all the time.
Facing the reality of life after service, luckily, we both got retained at our different places of primary assignment. He served at a construction company and got his employment letter a day before our passing out. He was so lucky that he was given a good offer at his new work place, and on this other side, I got retained as an admin staff at White Plain British School, Abuja.
The second phase of our love affair appeared really good – we both got good jobs and the next thing on our mind was…. Yes you are correct – MARRIAGE!
One thing that caught my deep feelings and interest in marrying him was that he had always respected my opinion which is saying “NO” when he has the urge of laying with me. I was born into a good home where immoralities were preached against, so I promised myself and my mother that i would not allow any man apart from my husband to take me to bed
My pride as a woman remained intact while I was dating him.
Being a human with blood in his vein, he would always have the urge but to my greatest surprise, he would respect the woman in me and would leave me whenever I turned him down. This made me to believe so much in him.
I still remember how we spent our Sundays, how he would always ask his roommate, Thompson, to come with his girl friend, Tina so we both could go for window-shopping and some Sundays would be for cinemas – this is a memory I still live to remember.
our relationship continued with much love, trust and care, but I wonder why life would introduce ups and downs in a sweet flow relationship like ours. It was during the recession in 2015 that most companies began to downsize. This affected my boyfriend – he was laid off, he got fired! I still remember the uncontrollable tears that flowed down my cheek when he said he could no longer stay back in Abuja doing nothing, that his parents told him to come back to Lagos to look for a job.
After being persuaded by him with his sweet words like “ out of sight is not out of mind”, I agreed that he should go, after all, I didn’t have control over him since we were not married and besides, he was going to look for a greener pasture for us – according to him o.
After few months that he left for Lagos, I got so attached to my phone. His calls came-in at random, his chats dropped in seconds intervals. We did video calls like we were never far apart. Every part of me knew I was in love with him, If the walls of my room could talk they will explain how I would stand in my room looking at his picture in a frame that i hanged to the wall and rehearse how I would be doing when I finally get married to Him.... hmm he really ate deep into my heart.
Nobody mattered to me apart from him. I turned deaf ears to every man coming to me. I became like a woman who had scales in her eyes – I was never seeing any man, i saw him to be the best, i placed him so high to the extent i thought nobody will ever be as handsome and trustworthy as he was.
After several months of speaking on phone, exchanging of text messages/ chats and video calls, I got the shock of my life. I saw my boyfriend's wedding invitation on social media, it was barely a year of his departure from Abuja and he already had someone he had proposed to and wanted to marry. I could not believe my eyes, “How come?” - i asked myself. We spoke everyday, even the night prior the day I saw the wedding invitation.
I quickly put some calls across to him but he never picked nor returned them.
Hmm....with the heaviest heart full of pain, I called Thompson to confirm if the post was from my boyfriend or his social media account was hacked. I was ready to believe that either his social media account was hacked or he was trying to play pranks on me. I was just praying that Thompson should tell me that my boyfriend was only playing pranks on me.
I got my heart broken when Thompson confirmed to me that it was true!
Sigh! My heart skipped several beats when I began to go through the comments on his wedding invitation post online. i saw comments like “congratulations bro” “finally you are going to marry the love of your life”.
“its always good to marry your longtime friend” - One of his friends i know very well commented. The comment that weaken the whole of my bones was this “wow you and my friend is finally tying the knot after four years of friendship” this is definitely coming from a lady who is a friend to the woman he was about to marry.
I later realized that he was dating this lady all the while he was with me here in Abuja.
I didn’t have any friend to share my pains with, I have always lived in a world that is all about him and I. I had no friends since most of the friends I had then told me to move on immediately he left for Lagos but I declined. They told me many disadvantages of distant relationship but i would not listen, rather , i told them that ours could be different. Now I could not even go to them to tell them that he was about getting married to someone else.
The only person I had was Thompson, we have been talking ever since his friend left for Lagos, he would call and ask if i was doing fine and would warn me to keep myself for his friend that he was sure that his friend would come back for me, this also solidified my trust and believe for my boy friend and our marriage.
Thompson felt very bad for me, though he tried to cover for his friend but he couldn’t amend the "broken egg". All he did was to amend my own broken heart, he showed excessive care and concerns. He took me out to places like the Abuja lake, lake mall and all. He had all the time because he also had soured relationship, he just broke up with his girl friend,Tina. Though he told me he just started another relationship and that the relationship was still at an incubation stage.
After few weeks of seeing each other and going to places with Thompson, I began to feel strange, just as if my scales were beginning to fall off my eyes, I began to notice another man. At first, I just couldn’t explain how I was feeling, I was forcing myself to have control over what I was feeling for Thompson – I thought within myself that it was not a right feeling.
He made it a Sunday routine to take me out, he really played a big role in healing my broken heart. One Sunday after church service, I called him so we could go to his house instead of going out to a garden or anywhere because I felt for how much he has always spent money at each of our outing.
I was beginning to like him, we have never been this close, and i did not even know how it feels to love someone else because Emeka was my first love, but the feelings i began to nurse towards Thompson is such a feelings that makes me feel like i am with the right person. I liked his kind of person.
We got to his place, I didn’t know how I lost my home training, I drew close to him, at that point, I forgot that he was my boyfriend's close friend, I stared straight into his eyes, he drew me closer like he ever wanted me, my lips met his, he hurriedly pushed me aside and went on his knees to tell me he was sorry to have made me feel the way i was feeling – he got me. That singular act melted my heart, with tears rolling down my cheek, i was forced to tell him that i love him and would want to be with him.
With wide smile, he welcomed my heart-felt and we fell in love!
Without wasting much of time, we started making plans for marriage, so I decided to tell emeka that I have finally moved on and that i have moved on with his friend. This is where a very big problem came in, he thought i wanted to use his friend to get back at him but sincerely, i never would have thought of that, i fell in love with Thompson just because i believed we are meant to be together. He rushed down to Abuja with all seriousness and confronted Thompson with huge threats, this is the same boyfriend who never fulfilled his promises each time he promised coming to visit me, he would also decline and give a thousand excuses each time i make a request of coming to see him at Lagos.
He came in to Abuja and promised that the marriage between Thompson and I would never hold because Thompson is his friend and that he still loves me, please have i done wrong to have fallen love with his friend?
Please I need your advice on this!!!
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